I am becoming a Yoga whore..yes I am getting around to alot of classes in the last couple of weeks. It started out when we saw a Yoga studio just about 1 mile from our house in the Albertsons shopping center. We checked it out and they had a 20 classes for $20 on sale. Who could refuse this? Yoga, for the most part has always been a challenge doing, going, staying at any Yoga Studio. The last Yoga I tried was Hot Yoga, where I nearly died of heat exhaustion. First few time I tried it, I became dizzy each time I stood in a sweltering room and tried to contort..I had to leave early a few times because I felt sick. The last hot Yoga class I left feeling nauseous and faint by the end of the class. I really, really wanted to like Hot Yoga! I wanted all those "amazing benefits" of Hot Yoga! I felt a bit like a failure when I could not get past the heat part. So I gave up, assuming being all Eastern meditative and flexible was not in my future.
Fast forward a few weeks ago, where I went to Yoga at the new place. It is not hot, seems almost manageable, even though I toppled over a few times the first couple of classes. Yesterday something finally clicked and it felt like I was getting ever slightly more stretchable, which is not saying much! I also began to like the feeling of "Child's pose" which got me to a state of new relaxation after doing some pretty hard poses...This is my best attempt to be a meditation person. I have never successfully been able to sit and "think of nothing" for more than 2 minutes. However, something about moving while meditating is easier for me. Julia, the new instructor is also amazing and encouraging. Something about her makes me think I could actually keep coming back and getting benefits of the practice. I plan on continuing as long as I can until the swimming, biking and running overtake our hours in the day.
We hired a coach on Monday. It is my old coach, Mark from Ironman Florida days, my first IM in 2004. IMFL was my PR and I have never been able to match it. When he asked me what my goals were for Ironman Arizona, I quickly said, without thinking-to break 14 hours..I figure any time faster than my last IM-Western Australia, where the heat gods got me, would bed good. H and I will be training with him separately and together. I look forward to being pushed in a different way.
Our triathlon and running race year seems to be shaping up. We were going to register for Jay Benson, the local sprint triathlon that has been here every year for 20 years. But seems the base director (race is on the air force base here) has other plans! The race director may not get a permit so registration is postponed until further notice. Bummer! I have begged off several morning rides in the last couple of weeks. My tolerance for training in the eff-ing cold is way down. I hate, hate hate, biking in the cold. When it stops being fun at all, I draw the line. ABQ us just not warming up to South American standards yet! Hopefully tomorrow, we can get out early to ride with a group. I am already psyching myself up and planning my many layers to begin the ride with...
I actually got into a pool the other day and swam 2000 yards. Wow! I never thought I could be so sore trying to swim! The muscles in my arms were freaking out, legs yelling at me and form was atrocious. I can only hope that with more practice, I will be less stiff in the pool. It did not help that when H and I got to the pool and asked to share a lane with an older guy, he yelled at us. Apparently, in this gym, the elderly get to call the shots in the pool? He finally moved out of his lane, griping to anyone who would listen about how rude we were to try and share a lane with him..Geez! Swimming at this new gym may be a challenge but I can beat up those old people if they start to get sassy with me! :) I can be just as grumpy and old-they better watch out!
Off to run today..I am having a grandson on Tuesday..I am on Cloud Nine!!
Musings of a Menopausal Triathlete..
Saturday, March 3, 2012
Thursday, March 1, 2012
Okay New Year, New Goal
I tumbled this idea inside my head for a few weeks. Should I keep blogging or not? I guess one reason to keep writing is to not let the cobwebs grow too much in my head. I read an article on "reasons to blog" and these are some:
1. You will find your kindred spirits.
I've made best buddies for life from my websites. After all, blogging and putting myself out there has helped me find you, my kindred thrifty spirit! My favorite part of blogging is making heart to heart connections with my readers.
2. Blogging is better than Facebook siphoning away countless hours.
I haven't found this balance yet but hopefully I can do both while not being a total online obsession about myself.
3. Your writing will improve.
4. Your photography will improve.
I always felt like I had a good eye, but snapping daily photos for my blog has helped my photography improve by far! I can take better pictures faster, and I keep learning every day.
5. You'll learn, grow, and discover yourself with every single post.
Your self improvements will go beyond writing, photography, and journaling. Blogging daily helps you make personal improvements. We improve on our weaknesses because they're highlighted when we document them. I like how Penelope Trunk says it: "Writing daily is a path to self discovery."
I have several races coming up in 2012. Why not write about this? Triathlon, running, biking, swimming-it's all therapy for me. Looking toward goals is how I find my life interesting. I fill in the spaces with family life, retirement life-which is not always that interesting. After our trip to South America, I was stunned that people enjoyed my writing. Really? I tend to be way more critical of myself when I blog, OMG my grammar, spelling, word phrasing sucks! I am apparently hardest on myself. The people who read my blog are way more forgiving of my errors..
My ultimate racing goal is Ironman Arizona-scheduled for November 18, 2012. In the meantime we have two weddings and one baby coming in 2012. This makes for interesting back stories. In our growing family of 10 plus 3 (baby and soon-to-be-son-in-laws) makes for some pretty interesting drama. Of course I can't share everything about all of our family, I still can write from a Grandma Debi perspective in general terms.
IMAZ (short for Ironman Arizona) will be my 5th Ironman race. We are hiring a coach, which I have done before. I have trained without a coach but results speak loudly to which is better. My first IM, I had a coach who trained me to do my PR for IM. I figure even though I am 8 years older, perhaps I can break my own personal record. We shall see! We also joined a new gym, I started doing yoga as a routine thing. I love Yoga-finally! I have tried and tried to love it before and been very inconsistent..The new Yoga place is 5 minutes from my house, it does not seem like a big production to get there each class...I plan on keeping up the practice, if only for the reason of maintaining my flexibility.
In my world of idle time and lack of structure, I welcome IM training as a way of "accomplishing something" and keeping myself on track. It is also a way to connect with other like minded, interesting people in the triathlon world, who challenge me physically and mentally. H does all that of course-it is just nice to expand my world..
It is a beautiful day in ABQ. We are off to the new gym to do weights and I may, just may-actually get in the pool today!
1. You will find your kindred spirits.
I've made best buddies for life from my websites. After all, blogging and putting myself out there has helped me find you, my kindred thrifty spirit! My favorite part of blogging is making heart to heart connections with my readers.
2. Blogging is better than Facebook siphoning away countless hours.
I haven't found this balance yet but hopefully I can do both while not being a total online obsession about myself.
3. Your writing will improve.
Blogging is daily writing practice. You'll learn to write engaging copy faster and you'll sharpen layout and content organization skills.
I always felt like I had a good eye, but snapping daily photos for my blog has helped my photography improve by far! I can take better pictures faster, and I keep learning every day.
5. You'll learn, grow, and discover yourself with every single post.
Your self improvements will go beyond writing, photography, and journaling. Blogging daily helps you make personal improvements. We improve on our weaknesses because they're highlighted when we document them. I like how Penelope Trunk says it: "Writing daily is a path to self discovery."
I have several races coming up in 2012. Why not write about this? Triathlon, running, biking, swimming-it's all therapy for me. Looking toward goals is how I find my life interesting. I fill in the spaces with family life, retirement life-which is not always that interesting. After our trip to South America, I was stunned that people enjoyed my writing. Really? I tend to be way more critical of myself when I blog, OMG my grammar, spelling, word phrasing sucks! I am apparently hardest on myself. The people who read my blog are way more forgiving of my errors..
My ultimate racing goal is Ironman Arizona-scheduled for November 18, 2012. In the meantime we have two weddings and one baby coming in 2012. This makes for interesting back stories. In our growing family of 10 plus 3 (baby and soon-to-be-son-in-laws) makes for some pretty interesting drama. Of course I can't share everything about all of our family, I still can write from a Grandma Debi perspective in general terms.
IMAZ (short for Ironman Arizona) will be my 5th Ironman race. We are hiring a coach, which I have done before. I have trained without a coach but results speak loudly to which is better. My first IM, I had a coach who trained me to do my PR for IM. I figure even though I am 8 years older, perhaps I can break my own personal record. We shall see! We also joined a new gym, I started doing yoga as a routine thing. I love Yoga-finally! I have tried and tried to love it before and been very inconsistent..The new Yoga place is 5 minutes from my house, it does not seem like a big production to get there each class...I plan on keeping up the practice, if only for the reason of maintaining my flexibility.
In my world of idle time and lack of structure, I welcome IM training as a way of "accomplishing something" and keeping myself on track. It is also a way to connect with other like minded, interesting people in the triathlon world, who challenge me physically and mentally. H does all that of course-it is just nice to expand my world..
It is a beautiful day in ABQ. We are off to the new gym to do weights and I may, just may-actually get in the pool today!
Monday, February 7, 2011
Old lady syndrome..
I am really bad about commitment as you can see. I have not posted for over a week. I WANT to blog, I just get caught up in the "getting going". I do have a problem with procrastination-only about some things though..Housework, bills, blogging..that kind of stuff..It is pretty strange to have that combination with my overly anal retentive, compulsive personality don't you think?
It's sort of like when you aren't in contact with a friend for awhile..Then it gets uncomfortable to think about calling..then I just don't contact that friend at all because..well it is awkward..That is how I am with blogging. It gets to be so long that then it feels overwhelming to start AT ALL. How weird is that?
Anyhoo, the health issue is still looming. I went to see the neurologist who basically tested me and indeed, I do have Carpal Tunnel Syndrome . Duh!! This didn't really surprise me..I think it is a garbage diagnosis if you ask me. However she did say with the weight loss and all, perhaps it was something else causing the CTS. So back to the drawing board. She referred me to a rheumatologist, who I see tomorrow..Of course my blood work is completely normal so I anticipate the new Dr. will still be searching for answers..
I did a sleep study, the Neuro doc (who BTW is a very sweet young woman..she could be my daughter's age which still blows me away!) thought it would be a good idea. So off I go to the "sleep lab" to be hooked up like Frankenstein and expected to "sleep" like normal. I actually did sleep! I was strange, but I did it! The tech told me in the morning I do not have enough REM sleep . And that I have movement in my sleep. Not very informative but I will get a full report hopefully this week.
In the meantime, my symptoms are improving..of course..So my cyberchondria diagnosis of rheumatoid arthritis is slowly dissipating..How could it be that if I am getting better? My mom got it one day and very soon afterwards, woke up and could not get out of bed! Grateful, thankful, happy that I am better! It is like how your car stops making that noise as soon as you are on you way to the auto shop..I am like that..
My running continues to improve. I kept up with my "real running" friends for 3 miles this past weekend. It thrilled me to no end. Then Sunday I was hoping for the same but as luck would have it, the minute I started running I had to go to the bathroom. H is use to this with me so we went in search of a bathroom, while the group faded in the distance. It ended up being outside bathroom on the Bosque. Thereafter my stomach issues did not stop. It is extremely difficult to pull down my compression tights in the woods, freezing ass temperatures and wind blowing 20 MPH. I did this several times on the run. My GI issues were BAD. The wind, the wind. It was one of the suckiest top ten runs I have ever done..But I did it! 12 miles-wasn't pretty-but done. Quite a contrast from the day before when I thought I was a rockstar. But oh well, can't get too confident, can I? Geez..
OK, so off to Sedona half marathon this weekend with our peeps..I am "only" doing the half. I wanted to sign up for the full marathon a couple of weeks ago but then I realized my longest run was only 12 miles at the time and changed my mind..I feel like the second string, once again. I do not think I will ever quite get into "the club", the ultra running group. I feel there is an unspoken barrier between those who can run well, and those who are slower (like me)..kind of elitist but hey, if I could run fast I would be one too!
We are planning a trip to Alaska this summer, tentatively. I lived in Alaska in my late teens and worked at a lifeguard at a ski resort. It is kind of hazy-the memory of that time. Perhaps it has to do with all the substances I was putting in my body which was the beginning of my life long struggle with addiction. I sure had fun though! I remember the following:
It's sort of like when you aren't in contact with a friend for awhile..Then it gets uncomfortable to think about calling..then I just don't contact that friend at all because..well it is awkward..That is how I am with blogging. It gets to be so long that then it feels overwhelming to start AT ALL. How weird is that?
Anyhoo, the health issue is still looming. I went to see the neurologist who basically tested me and indeed, I do have Carpal Tunnel Syndrome . Duh!! This didn't really surprise me..I think it is a garbage diagnosis if you ask me. However she did say with the weight loss and all, perhaps it was something else causing the CTS. So back to the drawing board. She referred me to a rheumatologist, who I see tomorrow..Of course my blood work is completely normal so I anticipate the new Dr. will still be searching for answers..
I did a sleep study, the Neuro doc (who BTW is a very sweet young woman..she could be my daughter's age which still blows me away!) thought it would be a good idea. So off I go to the "sleep lab" to be hooked up like Frankenstein and expected to "sleep" like normal. I actually did sleep! I was strange, but I did it! The tech told me in the morning I do not have enough REM sleep . And that I have movement in my sleep. Not very informative but I will get a full report hopefully this week.
In the meantime, my symptoms are improving..of course..So my cyberchondria diagnosis of rheumatoid arthritis is slowly dissipating..How could it be that if I am getting better? My mom got it one day and very soon afterwards, woke up and could not get out of bed! Grateful, thankful, happy that I am better! It is like how your car stops making that noise as soon as you are on you way to the auto shop..I am like that..
My running continues to improve. I kept up with my "real running" friends for 3 miles this past weekend. It thrilled me to no end. Then Sunday I was hoping for the same but as luck would have it, the minute I started running I had to go to the bathroom. H is use to this with me so we went in search of a bathroom, while the group faded in the distance. It ended up being outside bathroom on the Bosque. Thereafter my stomach issues did not stop. It is extremely difficult to pull down my compression tights in the woods, freezing ass temperatures and wind blowing 20 MPH. I did this several times on the run. My GI issues were BAD. The wind, the wind. It was one of the suckiest top ten runs I have ever done..But I did it! 12 miles-wasn't pretty-but done. Quite a contrast from the day before when I thought I was a rockstar. But oh well, can't get too confident, can I? Geez..
OK, so off to Sedona half marathon this weekend with our peeps..I am "only" doing the half. I wanted to sign up for the full marathon a couple of weeks ago but then I realized my longest run was only 12 miles at the time and changed my mind..I feel like the second string, once again. I do not think I will ever quite get into "the club", the ultra running group. I feel there is an unspoken barrier between those who can run well, and those who are slower (like me)..kind of elitist but hey, if I could run fast I would be one too!
We are planning a trip to Alaska this summer, tentatively. I lived in Alaska in my late teens and worked at a lifeguard at a ski resort. It is kind of hazy-the memory of that time. Perhaps it has to do with all the substances I was putting in my body which was the beginning of my life long struggle with addiction. I sure had fun though! I remember the following:
My parent lived in Anchorage for about 5 years in the 70s. I spent a summer+ with them in 1972(?)
I lived in the woods and worked at Alyeska probably for 6 months(?)..It will be interesting to see if the resort has changed and how..I also worked in the bakery at the resort and as a cleaning person for the hotel. I was a “jack of all trades”, huh?
I remember going on a cruise in the Kenai Peninsula with my mom back in the day..It was cool to see the glaciers..
I went to Fairbanks several times-don’t remember much there.
I do remember summer in Alaska playing volleyball at midnight because it was still light! The Land of the Midnight Sun it is!
IT rains A LOT in the summer so be prepared with rain gear..It will probably rain A LOT in July. When I worked as a lifeguard, the temperature hit a record 80 degrees or something. So it is generally cool up there..
Those are my remaining memories of Alaska and my short time there..
I really lived it up back in the day! The Alaska tour includes an overnight in the hotel I worked at. A full circle moment for sure!
That's it for now. More about the doctor visit later. I feel like one of those old ladies who obsesses over my body breaking down and discussing it Ad Nauseam. :)
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Music and training...
Here I sit with music piping throughout the new digs. We have a new system called "Sonos" which, is magic as far as I am concerned. They could have told me little green elves are in our walls making stupendous sounds throughout the house and I would understand as much. This new invention (well it is new to me) allows us to listen to different music in almost every room of the house. We get to choose from any music on our computers or any radio station, throughout the world. There are so many choices of songs to listen to, it is almost overwhelming. The good news is I am listening to WAY more music than I ever have. Alot less TV and my psyche must be jumping up and down..Less "Survivor", more soothing tones and Debi is a happier camper. I am hoping my newly rekindled love of music will stick with me..The "Sonos" is magic...
Training: If one reads my last post and then reads this, one would think I was two different people. As poopy as I feel when bedtime comes, during the day my running has gotten better. Don't know why, maybe the less weight is less to drag around. The running path is 2.5 minutes from our house. We have to hop a fence but then thousands of acres of beautiful mountain foothills are our new backyard. I will try and get pictures of that soon. We run up and down these rolling hills and I can finally, finally understand, after all these years, why folks like to run. I never have had that real "love" for running as I hear pray tell can happen to one..These past few months, I have only been running. I went out on my bike a big total of twice, maybe three times since the summer...Swimming..well, I will leave it at that. Let's just say I do not miss the smell of chlorine, at all..
We are training for several running races. First off is the Sedona Half Marathon in February. Damn, that is soon! A bunch of our crazy tri/running friends are going. I anticipate much fun as well as good weather (I can hope for the weather). The following weekend, I signed up for the "Austin Half Marathon". Oh just because I can, I suppose. It seemed like a good idea at the time..Really though I am doing that race to see 2 of my kids, who are racing too..It is a girls' weekend in the big city of Austin. My youngest lives there and from what I can tell, it is a pretty cool place, even if it is in Texas! (no offense to my Texas people..:))
The big event seems to be in April. H and I are going to do a 50k running trail race in Oklahoma-"Hog's Hunt"... I am pretty sure there are no pigs involved..That is 31.07 miles. I know because I just looked it up..say what?? I know, I know..it is insanity but believe it or not, this is childs' play in the gang I run with. It is considered an "ultra" running race, but just barely! Most of my people are getting into running 50 and 100 mile races..you know normal stuff like that..I somehow got a hold of the Koolaid and drank a bit, but not too much. I have NO DESIRE to run 50 miles, AT ALL. I am doing the 50k to see if I really like it at all. I know how to hurt, Ironman taught me that but this is a whole new level of pain so "they say". Not sure I am that much of a masochist but we shall see. I will admit I have gotten the whole "trail running" bug for sure. It takes the boredom out of running for me big time. I also downloaded a bunch of music that is 180 beats per/minute. I try and keep my pace at that when I run. I read somewhere this improves your running..It sure makes it more interesting!
Am I done with triathlon? No, I don't think so. H is talking about doing Ironman Florida in 2012. Some crazy talk like that. Again, I reiterate, I do NOT want to do another Ironman. Can resist come this November when we are in Florida cheering on the athletes and watching H sign up? Hmmm..we'll see..
Off to the doctor tomorrow where he will tell me exactly what is wrong with me at night..oh, wait-that was my crazy dream last night!
Training: If one reads my last post and then reads this, one would think I was two different people. As poopy as I feel when bedtime comes, during the day my running has gotten better. Don't know why, maybe the less weight is less to drag around. The running path is 2.5 minutes from our house. We have to hop a fence but then thousands of acres of beautiful mountain foothills are our new backyard. I will try and get pictures of that soon. We run up and down these rolling hills and I can finally, finally understand, after all these years, why folks like to run. I never have had that real "love" for running as I hear pray tell can happen to one..These past few months, I have only been running. I went out on my bike a big total of twice, maybe three times since the summer...Swimming..well, I will leave it at that. Let's just say I do not miss the smell of chlorine, at all..
We are training for several running races. First off is the Sedona Half Marathon in February. Damn, that is soon! A bunch of our crazy tri/running friends are going. I anticipate much fun as well as good weather (I can hope for the weather). The following weekend, I signed up for the "Austin Half Marathon". Oh just because I can, I suppose. It seemed like a good idea at the time..Really though I am doing that race to see 2 of my kids, who are racing too..It is a girls' weekend in the big city of Austin. My youngest lives there and from what I can tell, it is a pretty cool place, even if it is in Texas! (no offense to my Texas people..:))
The big event seems to be in April. H and I are going to do a 50k running trail race in Oklahoma-"Hog's Hunt"... I am pretty sure there are no pigs involved..That is 31.07 miles. I know because I just looked it up..say what?? I know, I know..it is insanity but believe it or not, this is childs' play in the gang I run with. It is considered an "ultra" running race, but just barely! Most of my people are getting into running 50 and 100 mile races..you know normal stuff like that..I somehow got a hold of the Koolaid and drank a bit, but not too much. I have NO DESIRE to run 50 miles, AT ALL. I am doing the 50k to see if I really like it at all. I know how to hurt, Ironman taught me that but this is a whole new level of pain so "they say". Not sure I am that much of a masochist but we shall see. I will admit I have gotten the whole "trail running" bug for sure. It takes the boredom out of running for me big time. I also downloaded a bunch of music that is 180 beats per/minute. I try and keep my pace at that when I run. I read somewhere this improves your running..It sure makes it more interesting!
Am I done with triathlon? No, I don't think so. H is talking about doing Ironman Florida in 2012. Some crazy talk like that. Again, I reiterate, I do NOT want to do another Ironman. Can resist come this November when we are in Florida cheering on the athletes and watching H sign up? Hmmm..we'll see..
Off to the doctor tomorrow where he will tell me exactly what is wrong with me at night..oh, wait-that was my crazy dream last night!
Sunday, January 23, 2011
Health issues..
Some strange, somewhat concerning health issues have arisen in my little world..
A. Unintentional Weight Loss-Now who knew this would ever be a problem for me. I spent years as a teenager and adult, trying to lose that "last 5-10 lbs". Through all my Ironman training, I only lost weight during my first one and it was very quickly packed back on after race day. When I was 40 years old, I participated in a body building competition and my body fat percentage got to an all time low. I dieted like a maniac for that show, it was torture. After my divorce in the 1980s, I got down to a frightening low weight-well it was a divorce-'nuf said, it was very temporary. So when I recently dropped 15 lbs in 2 months without even trying, I had mixed feelings. For one thing, happy that I finally reached the ever elusive weight goal I had when I was a teenager. All sorts of fad diets, wishing and praying for the almighty flat stomach seemed to evade my young life. Fast forward 40 years and here I am, goal reached! Now I get 2 kinds of reaction to this. "Wow you have lost alot of weight. Are you OK?" and "Wow you have lost alot of weight-you look great!" To which I reply to both "Thank you"? Weight is in the eye of the beholder, I suppose. My family does not think it is all that cool. H wants me to GAIN WEIGHT. Something I never thought I would hear him say..I have lost weight in well..some important body parts..I have had to buy smaller clothes, bras, etc. I finally, after all these years, have a "skinny closet". I have mixed feelings about all of this. I am happy to not have to worry about my weight or food for once. I am a bit alarmed because "sudden weight loss" which is "not voluntary" can be cause for alarm. I go to the doctor's office and mention it in passing and no one there seems alarmed, at all. As a matter of fact the last time I said something to the medical assistant, she got kind of snippy with me and said Your BMI is within normal limits! I have had my thyroid checked, and have normal routine blood work. So I am somewhat enjoying my current body with some reservations. I miss the muscle mass, which I need to work on...I am not continuing to lose, I have plateaued for the time being..
B. Numbness and tingling in extremities-This has been WAY more of a pain in the ass than the weight loss. At the beginning of December I woke up one day with my hand asleep-you know like everyone does at times. No big deal, except the next day it happened again, and daily again until both hands were now asleep upon awakening and hurt until I stood up and got blood to my hands. As time has gone on this has gotten worse and worse to the point I can't sleep some nights because my hands hurt so much lying down..And since I have not mastered the art of sleeping standing up..this has become a REAL annoyance. I have seen the doctor twice. First time, he just did not seem alarmed at all but thought it might be nice to see a neurologist. I got an appointment for the end of January. After 2 weeks I could not stand it so I went back and this time saw my regular doc, who took me more seriously and ordered an MRI and blood work. In the meantime I am getting more pissed off by the day that I can't get in to see a neurologist until this week. After the MRI, my doctor called me himself, which was amazing and scary. I thought for sure I had cancer of the hands if he were calling me. NO, he just wanted to tell me my MRI showed some changes in my cervical spine from 3 years ago, degenerative changes, etc..He is not sure that is what is causing my symptoms. He asked me how I was doing-I was floored-isn't that sad? Well besides the fact that I dread each night's bedtime and am barely sleeping normally and am scared out of my mind when I wake up from a dead sleep not being able to feel my hands, I'm great! Not only that, it was starting to come during the day just walking around now..He said he would try and get me into the Neuro guy sooner but I have not heard a word. So I see this Neurology guy on Thursday and if nothing is found there, my P. doc said something about a Neurosurgeon-holy crap-don't even want to think about that yet. I am appropriately scared for many reasons. First of all I am a hypochondriac of the highest order-I google symptoms to death and convince myself I have all kinds of ailments and am practically polishing up my will by the time I see a real medical person. Cyberchondria is my middle name. Secondly, women in my family tend to die young of auto-immune diseases. My doc checked my blood for a couple of them..normal..but the worry is constantly there for me. I just have to be patient and have learned to somewhat live with this condition and go with the flow as much as I can. I wake up often crying out from the pain in my hands and jump out of bed wringing them until blood flow gets to my extremities..It really, really sucks! I am having horrible nightmares and H says my whole body shakes like crazy when I sleep. It does not take a brain surgeon to figure out that I have something obviously going on in my nervous system. I have tried the wrist braces used for Carpel Tunnel Syndrome and it makes everything a hundred times worse so back to the store they went. I have tried sleeping on my back, with different pillows (this was the first doctor's suggestion-really?) I HATE it when doctors talk to you like you are 12 years old and do not know a thing about medicine. At least my PCP gets me and is aware that I know some stuff and he does not have to spell out much medically for me..
I am afraid that if this Neuro guy is an idiot, or tries to treat me like one, I may go screaming out of the doctors office at this point, my frustration is so bad. I am taking H with me to testify to my woes and hopefully bring that "male energy" that seems to sadly, but truly bring some answers in the male dominated medical world.
On a brighter note, my running has never been better..Go figure! More about that later...
I wait patiently and continue my daily stuff until Thursday, when I pray I will get some answers!
A. Unintentional Weight Loss-Now who knew this would ever be a problem for me. I spent years as a teenager and adult, trying to lose that "last 5-10 lbs". Through all my Ironman training, I only lost weight during my first one and it was very quickly packed back on after race day. When I was 40 years old, I participated in a body building competition and my body fat percentage got to an all time low. I dieted like a maniac for that show, it was torture. After my divorce in the 1980s, I got down to a frightening low weight-well it was a divorce-'nuf said, it was very temporary. So when I recently dropped 15 lbs in 2 months without even trying, I had mixed feelings. For one thing, happy that I finally reached the ever elusive weight goal I had when I was a teenager. All sorts of fad diets, wishing and praying for the almighty flat stomach seemed to evade my young life. Fast forward 40 years and here I am, goal reached! Now I get 2 kinds of reaction to this. "Wow you have lost alot of weight. Are you OK?" and "Wow you have lost alot of weight-you look great!" To which I reply to both "Thank you"? Weight is in the eye of the beholder, I suppose. My family does not think it is all that cool. H wants me to GAIN WEIGHT. Something I never thought I would hear him say..I have lost weight in well..some important body parts..I have had to buy smaller clothes, bras, etc. I finally, after all these years, have a "skinny closet". I have mixed feelings about all of this. I am happy to not have to worry about my weight or food for once. I am a bit alarmed because "sudden weight loss" which is "not voluntary" can be cause for alarm. I go to the doctor's office and mention it in passing and no one there seems alarmed, at all. As a matter of fact the last time I said something to the medical assistant, she got kind of snippy with me and said Your BMI is within normal limits! I have had my thyroid checked, and have normal routine blood work. So I am somewhat enjoying my current body with some reservations. I miss the muscle mass, which I need to work on...I am not continuing to lose, I have plateaued for the time being..
B. Numbness and tingling in extremities-This has been WAY more of a pain in the ass than the weight loss. At the beginning of December I woke up one day with my hand asleep-you know like everyone does at times. No big deal, except the next day it happened again, and daily again until both hands were now asleep upon awakening and hurt until I stood up and got blood to my hands. As time has gone on this has gotten worse and worse to the point I can't sleep some nights because my hands hurt so much lying down..And since I have not mastered the art of sleeping standing up..this has become a REAL annoyance. I have seen the doctor twice. First time, he just did not seem alarmed at all but thought it might be nice to see a neurologist. I got an appointment for the end of January. After 2 weeks I could not stand it so I went back and this time saw my regular doc, who took me more seriously and ordered an MRI and blood work. In the meantime I am getting more pissed off by the day that I can't get in to see a neurologist until this week. After the MRI, my doctor called me himself, which was amazing and scary. I thought for sure I had cancer of the hands if he were calling me. NO, he just wanted to tell me my MRI showed some changes in my cervical spine from 3 years ago, degenerative changes, etc..He is not sure that is what is causing my symptoms. He asked me how I was doing-I was floored-isn't that sad? Well besides the fact that I dread each night's bedtime and am barely sleeping normally and am scared out of my mind when I wake up from a dead sleep not being able to feel my hands, I'm great! Not only that, it was starting to come during the day just walking around now..He said he would try and get me into the Neuro guy sooner but I have not heard a word. So I see this Neurology guy on Thursday and if nothing is found there, my P. doc said something about a Neurosurgeon-holy crap-don't even want to think about that yet. I am appropriately scared for many reasons. First of all I am a hypochondriac of the highest order-I google symptoms to death and convince myself I have all kinds of ailments and am practically polishing up my will by the time I see a real medical person. Cyberchondria is my middle name. Secondly, women in my family tend to die young of auto-immune diseases. My doc checked my blood for a couple of them..normal..but the worry is constantly there for me. I just have to be patient and have learned to somewhat live with this condition and go with the flow as much as I can. I wake up often crying out from the pain in my hands and jump out of bed wringing them until blood flow gets to my extremities..It really, really sucks! I am having horrible nightmares and H says my whole body shakes like crazy when I sleep. It does not take a brain surgeon to figure out that I have something obviously going on in my nervous system. I have tried the wrist braces used for Carpel Tunnel Syndrome and it makes everything a hundred times worse so back to the store they went. I have tried sleeping on my back, with different pillows (this was the first doctor's suggestion-really?) I HATE it when doctors talk to you like you are 12 years old and do not know a thing about medicine. At least my PCP gets me and is aware that I know some stuff and he does not have to spell out much medically for me..
I am afraid that if this Neuro guy is an idiot, or tries to treat me like one, I may go screaming out of the doctors office at this point, my frustration is so bad. I am taking H with me to testify to my woes and hopefully bring that "male energy" that seems to sadly, but truly bring some answers in the male dominated medical world.
On a brighter note, my running has never been better..Go figure! More about that later...
I wait patiently and continue my daily stuff until Thursday, when I pray I will get some answers!
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